Day 8… November 8

Today I am grateful for the beach and the ocean.

I grew up in the middle of the United States. From the age of 2 weeks to 18 years I lived nowhere near a beach. (Missouri :))

At 18 I moved away for college and got closer to the beach, technically, but still nowhere near. (Idaho :))

The first time I saw the ocean I was 19, nearly 20 years old when I moved to California. I had just started dating this boy in California and he liked to surf. I ended up spending a lot of time with that boy…..32 years so far!

My first beach trip was Half Moon Bay, California.

I love the peace and tranquility I feel with my bare feet in the sand and the sound of the waves.

I love how amazingly vast the ocean is.

Some people collect things from the places they travel. I collect sand. I have a little jar of sand from nearly every beach we have visited.

It is a little piece of the feeling I love here in my home in Arizona until I can get back to the beach.

I know there are those that go to the beach and need to have things to do…and those things are fun. We have boogie boards, skim boards, stand up paddle boards, snorkel gear, crossnet, paddle ball sets, sand toys…

We even took surf lessons on one trip to Ensenada!

But for me, I am content with a chair, my hat, and my sweatshirt (yes, I am almost always cold!!), and maybe a blanket or at least a beach towel to cover up with. I can just sit and watch the waves and listen to the ocean.

The easternmost beach we have visited so far is Coco Cay, Bahamas. The farthest west beach we have been to is so far west it is nearly east. Ngarunui Beach, Raglan, New Zealand is on the west coast of the North Island. The black sand there was like I have never seen.

I don’t know if the beach makes me realize how small I really am in comparison to the rest of the planet, but I do know that I feel awe and wonder and profound respect for the Creator of the Universe there.

I’m Michelle. I am learning how to minimize my overwhelm, perfectionism, and people-pleasing and I am ready to help you do the same. I’m a certified Life Coach and a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Come with me and learn how.

Catalina Island – Oct 2022

Coco Cay, Bahamas

South Beach, Miami, Florida

Day 7… November 7

Today I am grateful for technology.

It is incredible to pay attention to where technology has evolved in my lifetime.

Yes, to many techies I am old…52 is practically ancient!

And that’s okay! So just a quick look at the changes technology has provided.

Communication was in person, on the wired telephone attached to the wall, paying lots of money for long distance phone calls, or written correspondence in the mail.

If you wanted to “talk” to your friend during school you had to pass a note and hope you didn’t get caught. As you got older the notes could be intricately folded and deposited in the friend’s locker in case you didn’t have a chance to see them.

Computers took up multiple rooms and were way to complicated for the average person (this is my perception anyway :))

Maps were papers folded neatly to be stored in the glove compartment of your car. Multiple maps were needed for long trips.

Movies were reel to reel to be played on a projector and you needed a screen.

We typed things on our typewriter and if we made a mistake we pulled out our correction tape to “erase” the mistake.

Now what do I have?

• Multiple tvs in my home with multiple streaming services that allow me to watch an inordinate amount of content on demand.

• 2 computers that are thinner but about the size of my high school TrapperKeeper as well as a desk top computer.

• I have multiple external hard drives that store so much information I will probably never look at again along with storing old photos, and videos through generations of years.
• Cordless phones that I can use anywhere in my house, and yet no one in our house will actually answer that phone anymore. Why?
• Everyone in our house has their own cell phone and each has more internal memory than my first 3 computers combined.
• Our cell phones call long distance at little to no cost and we can avoid any cost using messaging apps to communicate instantly.
• I can (and in some ways do!!) live like George Jetson and video call people all over the world in real time.
• I work in my home office to meet with clients practically anywhere, every day, and distance has no bearing on when or how long we can meet.

• Not only that but I can meet via video with multiple people in multiple locations across the world in real time
• I can send or receive money instantly, for free, without having to go into a bank and see the teller or see the other person
• The notes passed in school are now all stored in my phone and can include, photos, videos, gifs, emojis…. and all kinds of other things that weren’t possible before
• The camera on my phone is probably better than most of the cameras that took all the “famous and historical” photos that I love.
• My watch can: be answered when someone is calling or sending me messages, measure what my heart rate is and alert me if my heart rate drops below 40 beats per minute (didn’t know that was a thing until it happened….twice! :)), keep track of how much I sleep, vibrate to wake me up or remind me to move if I am sitting too long, measure how far I run and how fast I run, tell me what the weather is outside as well as in Florida where my daughter and son-in-law live or Auckland, New Zealand where more family lives, open my garage door……….and so much more!!! All on my wrist watch!!

I’m Michelle. I am learning how to minimize my overwhelm, perfectionism, and people-pleasing and I am ready to help you do the same. I’m a certified Life Coach and a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Come with me and learn how.

Day 6… November 6

Today I am grateful for Sundays.

Once I was at a gathering of some ladies that I attend church with and we were playing a “Get to Know You” game.

One of the questions was, “What is your favorite day of the week?”

I took no time writing my answer. Sunday.

I love Sundays. They are my favorite day of the week. I look forward to Sundays. I need Sundays.

For some that seems the exact opposite of how they feel.

I have several friends and family members who dread Sundays because they are already worrying about Monday and going back to work. They are stuck in the anxiety of the week ahead.

Gratefully, I love my work and what I am able to do so that is not something I struggle with at the present moment.

For others, particularly of my faith, Sundays can be a long day. Especially as a mother of younger children, or someone in a leadership position.

We attend church for 2 hours each week and it isn’t always at the most opportune time. Yes, there are other times we could attend, but we are encouraged to attend our own “ward” or congregation that is determined by geographical area.

For those with small children particularly that can be difficult for meal times and naptimes. And the fact that the first hour is for the entire congregation together…. kids sitting listening to speakers for that long is hard more often than not.

For those in leadership positions in our faith, various other meetings might happen on Sundays. All the positions in our congregations are volunteer rather than paid so we are all doing our best to serve in our community as well as working our normal jobs throughout the week.

Even with all of that, I love Sundays!

It is easier now that my kids are mostly grown.

Sundays are a day that is different than any other day of the week for me. I listen to different things. I read and study different things. I don’t work. I spend time being still. I spend time with my family (when they allow that :)). I dress differently than other days. It is a different day because I want it to be.

For me, I am grateful to partake of the sacrament on Sunday each week at church in remembrance of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. It is a renewal of my commitment to God to show I am willing to always remember Him.

It is also a day to strengthen our extended families.

On the first Sunday of the month, we have a Zoom call with our extended family that can attend. My dad and his new wife, along with all my siblings and spouses and as many of our kids as can, meet together to talk and learn gospel principles. We get to know more about each other’s lives. We develop bonds with each other. It is a time I look forward to each month.

“And he said unto them, The sabbath was made for man, and not man for the sabbath:” -Mark 2:27 KJV

For me, Sundays are a gift from God to rest from the rest of the worldly things that fill my week. A day He gives us for spiritual and physical renewal.

I’m Michelle. I am learning how to minimize my overwhelm, perfectionism, and people-pleasing and I am ready to help you do the same. I’m a certified Life Coach and a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Come with me and learn how.

Day 5… November 5

Today I am grateful for parents.

This includes my own parents, my mother and father in-law, and the bonus people that have come into my life.

My mother and father-in-law were some of the best people I have known. That is not to say they were perfect people. I loved them and they were REAL people.

My mother-in-law was born and raised in Belfast, Ireland. The challenges she over came and the stories she shared of moving from Belfast, Ireland to Auckland, New Zealand when she was about 16 years old were fascinating.

My father-in-law had his share of adventures. Moving from Apia, Samoa to Auckland, New Zealand to further his education. There meeting my mother-in-law and they eloped.

Then moving their family to the United States for a new life, leaving family and friends behind, they settled in California which is where I met them and got to know them while my husband and dated, had our engagement and wedding, and then lived next door to them for the first 2 years we were married.

Even though we moved to Arizona and felt so far away from them in California, it wasn’t too long before they followed us and moved to Arizona too.

My mother-in-law passed away on December 1, 2004. I knew that she loved me and my family and always wanted the best for us.

When his wife passed away, after a time, my father-in-law started sharing his life with someone new. She was one of the bonus people I was referring to. They were good to us and our kids. We loved family dinners and holidays and time spent together.

My father-in-law passed away on January 18, 2019. Sadly we have not been able to keep in close contact with our bonus person the past few years. I still love her and am so grateful for all she did for my father-in-law and for each of our families.

I’m Michelle. I am learning how to minimize my overwhelm, perfectionism, and people-pleasing and I am ready to help you do the same. I’m a certified Life Coach and a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Come with me and learn how.

Day 4… November 4

Late posting but still getting it done!!

Today I am thankful for organized sports.

We have been a sports family for a long time.

I started participating on a track team when I was around 8 or 9 years old. It was a major part of my life for the next decade plus into college. I also ran cross country, and played volleyball and basketball.

My husband started around age 7 with little league baseball, playing baseball until he graduated high school. He also played flag football. His love was and is basketball playing in college and even a stint as a semi-pro basketball player for a season at age 40. He didn’t start playing tennis until around age 21.

We have both continued to participate in sports in various ways throughout our lives, still finding ways to participate including coaching our kid’s teams.

Our kids started playing soccer around age 4 or 5 so we have been soccer parents for the past 24 years. They have all also played basketball, baseball, wrestling, football, ran track and cross country, summer and high school swim teams, softball for our daughters, volleyball for our boys. Most often our kids were playing on multiple teams at a time. (Think high school football team and competitive soccer team at the same time.)

In fact, I am writing this post on my phone while waiting for tonight’s football game to begin. Our youngest daughter is a high school junior and is the varsity place kicker. (She was 2 for 2 on PATs tonight!)

I know there are some who think maybe we allowed sports too large an influence for our kids. There I times I may have thought the same thing myself. The fall where we had 6 different soccer teams with up to 10 practices and a game each week, and 3 high school football games (Freshman on Wednesdays, JV on Thursdays and Varsity on Fridays) every week were “fun” for sure! But I am grateful for what our family has gained and feel it out weighs the drawbacks.

There are many reasons I am grateful for organized sports and the things it has taught me and my kids. Responsibility… cooperation… dedication… prioritization of time and energy… communication… success… failure… leadership… sportsmanship… disappointment… joy… frustration… acceptance… growth……..

I could go on and on.

I am grateful to so many coaches and “team moms” that made it worth it. So many opportunities were given to our family. I am especially grateful for the friendships made not only for my kids but for me!

I have loved being able to watch my kids compete. All the soccer matches, basketball games, little league games, track meets, volleyball games and football games. I have loved being able to see the growth from “swarm ball” (think 5 on 5 soccer with 4 and 5 year olds :)) to the NIRSA National Men’s Soccer Championship match or first attempts at pole vaulting to WAC Championship Track and Field meets.

My heart has broken when there were injuries that seemingly stole the dreams of the season ahead. A broken arm at the beginning of a baseball season; a broken leg the week before the soccer tournament season began; back pain that made playing so challenging but didn’t stop him; foregoing a season to rest and recover from injuries in one sport so that it didn’t stop the season of a different sport 3 months later; the torn ACL that was a 10 month plus recovery.

I have loved the determination, resilience and team spirit shown by kids who had to sit on the sidelines for months and months due to these broken bones and surgeries only to go right back to the teams they love.

Sports and organized teams have definitely come at a cost, financially and in time and energy. But the cost were and will continue to be far out weighed but the return on our investment.

Sports and organized teams have definitely come at a cost, financially and in time and energy. But the cost were and will continue to be far out weighed but the return on our investment.

I’m Michelle. I am learning how to minimize my overwhelm, perfectionism, and people-pleasing and I am ready to help you do the same. I’m a certified Life Coach and a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Come with me and learn how.

Welcome to my next experiment!!

Once again, I have taken time to notice what my brain offers me. This time I decided to spend some time examining those thoughts and questioning them.

In my last post I shared a letter from my future self.

I have spent the past month looking at the life I am creating for my future self.

What is her work schedule?

Who does she work with?

Why does she choose the things that fill her time?

What led to her state of general contentment, dare I even say “Happiness”, with her life?

Today I am starting a month of daily blog posts.

It is an exercise in showing up in a way that I want to not because it ‘means’ anything for my business, or even about me personally.

I am showing up in a way that I want to cultivate in my life and daily practice.

You get to be the unwitting participant/witness in my experiment.

With Thanksgiving this month, it is the easiest time of year to focus on gratitude. So to make it a daily practice and something I would like to continue throughout the year, I plan to write a blog post every day this month about something I am grateful for.

I will tell you now, some posts will be longer than others. Some might only be a couple of paragraphs. Some may include pictures. Who knows what this will look like?

But in 31 days it will look like 31 more blog posts (hopefully :).

I am allowing it to be what it is without expectation or judgment for myslef.

And at the same time, I am willing to offer myself grace if I mess up. That is not my intent (messing up) and I am fully committed to doing this daily, but I am willing to consider the “grace” route over the criticism and blame I have resorted to in the past for anything less than perfection.

Why gratitude?

It is not joy that makes us grateful; it is gratitude that makes us joyful.

– David Steindl-Rast

I can’t even tell you how many years ago I heard this quote for the first time and it has never left me.

I fully believe this with my whole heart and now we live in a world that offers scientific evidence to back it up.

Gratitude can literally rewire your brain. The chemicals serotonin and dopamine that are released help us to feel good in the moment as well as developing a more positive outlook in general.

There are physical measurable side effects even beyond the mental health properties such as stress hormone levels which directly effect heart health.

In a world of so many things that go wrong and horrible things that happen around us everyday, I want to focus on all the miracles and wonderful things that are happening right beside me.

Coupling this practice of gratitude with coaching, both as the coach as well as the client, gives me the opportunity to create more of the life I want while developing my “gratitude muscles”.

I’m Michelle. I am learning how to minimize my overwhelm, perfectionism, and people-pleasing and I am ready to help you do the same. I’m a certified Life Coach and a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Come with me and learn how.

Today I am sharing an exercise I finally did in the past week. It has been on my list of things to do for nearly two years now, but it always felt too hard.

It seemed like something outside of my reach. However, in my own growth and exploration I found it had more to do with my own beliefs and expectations around actually voicing what I want to create for myself. The belief that wanting things for myself and actually saying them or writing them down was selfish when my life is so wonderful. How could I even ask for more? The nerve!!!

So in this exercise, the me of the future writes a letter to me in the present.

She is exactly where I want to be in my life and my business. (Do I even know where that is?)

What advice would she give me?

What would she tell me to stop doing?

What would she tell me to start doing?

What else would she tell me?

The idea was to set a timer for 5 or 10 minutes and just write, even if you start with “I am not sure what my future self would say – what does she want me to know?” (and I DID start with just that!!!)

And so I began. And when the timer went off after 10 minutes I found I had more to write….. over 10 minutes more. What came out was more bullet points than a formal letter per se.

So for today I share with you what my “Future Self” said to me. Take it for what it’s worth.

For me, it is priceless!!!

A Letter From My Future Self – August 23, 2022

• You should know that this whole journey was never as important as you thought it was.
• It was only a small piece about the business itself and so much more about the person you become in the process.
• Lighten up on the “shoulds” you hold so tightly. Those are only reflections of the expectations imposed by your old habits and thought patterns and other people who think they know what is best for you.
• Stop avoiding looking inward and trusting yourself. You have more intuition and wisdom than you give yourself credit for. Develop the relationship with yourself right where you are and continue to stretch yourself – not because you need fixing but just to show yourself what is possible for you.
• Develop your relationship with your Heavenly Father. He has a plan for you & He knows you and all that you desire. As you develop that relationship you will be less afraid to ask Him what He wants for you and tell Him the things you want for yourself. He is a giver of gifts and wants to help you achieve your righteous desires.
• Remember that while it is not about getting more money, it is about money. Money allows you more freedom; Money allows you to serve more generously; Money allows you to give more freely; Money allows you to help in new and different ways that you didn’t know before.
• Be wise with your money but don’t be too concerned about it. Money is a tool that moves your work forward to bless your life and the lives of your family and those around you.
• The business “we” created is to support our life and the things we most value, not the other way around. Be mindful of the balance of work and life. If one must overpower the other, CHOOSE LIFE. You spent too many years choosing work out of fear and lack.
• You have been so blessed in your life. Remember those blessings and the blessings that will continue to come. Be grateful for where you are. Be present in the moment.
• Remember that life does not have to be “either/or”, “black or white”, it can be “and/both”! You can be grateful for the present AND continue to learn and grow and desire more. You can hold both of those thoughts at the same time.
• Remember that not everything your brain offers you is helpful, useful or kind. Be discriminating with the things you choose to believe.
• Have fun and be willing to be bad! That’s how we got so good at the things we do well now.
• Surround yourself with those who believe in you and your plan. And remember that their support, while nice, is nowhere near as important as the support you give yourself.

I’m Michelle. I am learning how to minimize my overwhelm, perfectionism, and people-pleasing and I am ready to help you do the same. I’m a certified Life Coach and a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Come with me and learn how.