Our feelings or emotions are what drive all of our behaviors. We may think that we can hide our feelings from those around us but they “show up” in subtle ways that those around us can sense on some level. This can be especially true with negative emotions. Human beings can “read” other human beings even if they can’t articulate what they are noticing. Sometimes you just “sense” something is off.
Our most effective actions are driven by feelings or emotions that are empowering. These emotions might not always feel good. When I am trying something new I am putting myself at risk of failure which will most likely feel uncomfortable. But it is feeling those things outside our comfort zone like fear or commitment…..grit or determination, maybe even that failure, that moves us forward. Determination is empowering even when it doesn’t always feel good. It is more difficult to take empowering action in our comfort zone.
We can definitely use will power to get us through a situation, but generally our will power will only last so long and the ability to force our way through comes to an end. When we learn to harness the power of emotions, when we choose to be intentional in the way we want to feel, that is the beginning of the real work.
That is not to say we should try to avoid all negative emotions. We are supposed to feel the negative as well as the positive. Negative feelings usually signal to us to avoid, turn back, or stop what we are doing. Sometimes it is referred to “Fight or Flight” behavior that is there to protect us. In our present world however, those dangers our mind is creating are not generally real dangers. When we can become aware of those emotions and recognize we are actually safe, we can continue to move forward.
And it helps to keep in mind that we would never be able to appreciate the positive emotions if it weren’t for the negative emotions. What is happiness without sadness? What is joy without sorrow? What is peace without unrest? What is success without failure? The scriptures tell us, “For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things…” (2 Nephi 2:11, The Book of Mormon, Another Testament of Christ)
As we discussed previously, emotions are just vibrations in our bodies. As humans our thoughts can cause “chemical spills” in our brain that lead to physiological responses in our bodies. Maybe it makes our heart race, or maybe we feel a tightening in our chest or throat. Maybe it is a “buzzing” or “electric” feeling in our skin. Whatever the vibration is, it is in correlation to the emotion we are experiencing.
This week will be short and sweet (is that even possible for me? ;)), as I am currently out of town with some of my kids creating some emotions. Emotions I am cultivating today include…… love, childlike wonder, energetic, a little bit of fear, excitement, exhilaration, gratitude, exhaustion, fun, frustration, a hint of sadness, disgust, and joy, lots of joy!!…just to name few.
So next time we will talk a little more about our emotions and whether or not emotions are problems that we need to solve for. We will look briefly at the “emotional whirlwind” that is any given day and how we can handle “the storms”. And just maybe, I will share some personal examples of what emotions look and feel like for me, and how you can start to notice what they look and feel like for you.
I’m Michelle. I am learning how to minimize my overwhelm, perfectionism, and people-pleasing and I am ready to help you do the same. I’m a certified Life Coach and a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Come with me and learn how.
If you would like help in working through some of the emotions you might be seeing as a struggle, or if you want to work on processing and letting go of some of your lingering emotions with me just “Contact Me” and send me a quick email. Or you can “Schedule a Consult” for a free session to discuss what you want to work on and how to get started.
And as always…..Remember…..It’s ALL good!!